


Memories of Sand and Stars

by Im_going_insane_so_I_write



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Abuse, Abused Lance (Voltron), Aromantic Asexual Pidge | Katie Holt, Cuban Lance (Voltron), Depressed Lance, Depressed Lance (Voltron), GUESS WHAT, Genderfluid Pidge | Katie Holt, Here we go, Highschool AU, Homophobia, I suck at writing, Lance (Voltron) Has ADHD, Lance is an immigrant, Lance is from Cuba, Lancey Lance, M/M, Modern AU, Self Harm, Self-Harm, Suicidal Lance, Suicidal Lance (Voltron), Suicide Attempt, Texas, homophobes :(((, i apologize deeply, im an idiot, im hungry, im not good at this but i'll try, klance, lance has adhd too, lance wanna die, lance's siblings yeeted away, lances mom is abusive and his dad, no one call them katie you'll die, people suck, pidge is genderfluid and a mess, poor lance, poor lancey has to deal with racism, they say to write the story you wnat to read so here I am
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-11-29
Updated: 2020-04-19
Packaged: 2021-02-26 06:15:31
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 7
Words: 1,987
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21599035
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Im_going_insane_so_I_write/pseuds/Im_going_insane_so_I_write
Summary: Lance moved from Cuba to America just a few months ago. Since then, he has become close friends with a few people. He has a small crush on one friend, too. But no one is aware of the sinking, terrible truth. Lance is depressed. Lance is abused. Lance is hurting and Lance is going to break. Who will be there when he does?
Relationships: Keith & Lance (Voltron), Keith/Lance (Voltron), Klance - Relationship
Comments: 32
Kudos: 136





	1. Wet Sleeves

Lance POV

I look around the classroom, and no eyes are up. Everyone else is working on the test, but I just can't grasp the concept and have no idea how to complete the packet. I glance at Pidge, but his eyes are on his paper, a blue rubber bracelet (to tell us what his pronouns are right now) sitting on the corner of his desk. I pout slightly and look back down at my test, the self-criticism starting to flow in.

Stupid

It was dumb of you to ever think you could do this

Worthless

Dependent

Useless

Unlovable

They start out relevant, but soon just become a list of things about myself I hate. I feel a panic attack coming on and try to stop it, closing my eyes tightly. I feel my arm shoot into the air.

"Yes Mr.McClain?"

"Can I go to the bathroom?"

"Of course." I book it from my desk and out the door, to the bathroom. I sit myself onto a toilet and pop off my phone case, a few xacto knife blades sitting inside. One hand shakily grabs a blade while the other attempts to tug up my sleeve. I put it close to my wrist, then shake my head. Not here, at school, where anyone could walk in. I'm in slight disbelief that I'm so dumb that I almost cut myself in a place where anyone could come in and catch me. I put the blades away and flush the toilet, pretending to have been going to the bathroom. I open the stall and wash my hands quickly, shaking ever so slightly. Dammit, I can't stop shaking. The door to the bathroom opens and a pale guy with dark hair walks in. 

"Hey Lance. You skipping, or just gonna go back to that dumb test y'all have?"

"I'm going to go back. Also, never say 'y'all' again, please. I'm begging you Keith." I say, smiling softly. He flips me off and then gasps looking at my arms. For a moment, I thought he saw my cuts, the self harm riddling my arms. Maybe bruises from my damned parents.

"You wash your hands with your sleeves down? Monster!" Or maybe not. Maybe he's just a cute idiot. I roll my eyes and dry my hands.

"I got to get back to class."

"Okay, see ya in second." I nod and leave, returning to the test I don't understand.


	2. At Home

Lance POV

God. I wish that I was back in that stupid test that I no doubt flunked. I would rather feel like an idiot than feel the constant impact of their fists, palms, and feet as my parents beat me senseless. My father grabs my hand and holds it down, and my mom stomps the end of her high heel into my hand. I scream from the pain, and she keeps going, crushing my hand and the bones in it. I feel broken and can barely breathe. 

"Dumb boy. Go clean up and make sure no one can see that." I nod at my father's words and limp upstairs, closing my bedroom door behind me. I fall to the ground and cry softly, getting a blade and just cutting the arm with my injured hand. Not deep, but deep enough for blood to spill. Then I clean my arms and body, until only my hand is untouched. It looked fine, but touching it I realize I have at least a fracture, if not more. My fingers are in pain. And of course, it is my dominant hand. There is almost no way I can hide this. Everyone will see, they will know, they will hate me. Because I am way too weak to defend myself. I fall asleep on the floor, homework untouched.


	3. Back at School

Lance POV

The next day I walk into school and over to my small friend group. Everyone else is there and smiles, so I smile back. A fake smile of course, but they all believe it. Why wouldn't they? Anyways, I turn to Allura to start my routine of flirting with her, even though I'm not attracted to her at all. Then she'll tell me to fuck off and we'll all laugh, and everyone will call me annoying and then I'll keep the pain inside.

"Hey princess, you're looking quite beautiful today."

"Oh shut up Lance." That's a bit harsher than usual. "I'm not in the mood for your flirting, it's annoying."

"Alright, I'll save it for later, princess." I do finger guns without thinking, showing my bruised and battered hand that's in constant pain. My friends gasp, and Pidge speaks up.

"Lance, what happened to your hand?" I glance at Pidge's wrist and see a white wristband, meaning they're a they right now.

"Nothing, Pidgeon. Don't worry about it!" I say, smiling and waving the hand, even though it hurts to do so.

"It looks like it might be broken. In, like, multiple places." They walk over and grab my hand gently. They go to push up my sleeve and check if the bruising goes further up, and I panic.

"No!" I say, shoving them away. They fall into Hunk and look at me, eyes sad. "I'm so sorry... I..."

"Just let me check." They say in a slightly shaking voice, standing again. I shake my head, and they sigh. "I have to check. I don't want you getting hurt worse." 

I try to object, but they grab my arm and push up my sleeve, then gasp and drop my arm, tears gathering in their eyes. 

"Lance..." They mumble. I look away, and everyone looks at Pidge, confused on why they're crying. "Lance, why...?"

I shrug, and Shiro speaks up.

"Lance, what's going on?" I look down and take a shaky breath.

"Nothing, I'm fine." Suddenly, I feel Pidge's small hands on my arm, then cold air on my cuts as they cry and our friend group stares. Hunk looks sick. Keith looks like he was figuring something out there and then. Allura gasps.

"Lance, why did you do this to yourself?" She asked. I yank my arm from Pidge.

"It doesn't matter, I'm fine." I mumble, walking away. Pidge walks quickly after me, having the same class. They're clearly worried about me, but whatever. I don't care. I'll do it tonight, end it all tonight.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> please leave comments, if you can! They mean a lot!!
> 
> Also, do you think that everyone found out about that too fast? They won't find out about the abuse for a bit, because Lance is gonna lie and say it was a bully or something.


	4. Breathing Quickly

Lance POV

I take a deep breath, seeing Pidge talking to the teacher rapidly and motioning at me, tears in their eyes. The teacher glances at me, and once Pidge gets to their desk, calls someone. Right after class starts, an office volunteer comes down holding a note. It instructs me to go to the principal's office. F u c k. I reach out and grab it with my good hand, causing the teacher to raise an eyebrow. I start to hyperventilate as I stalk towards the faculty offices. I don't want to do this. I don't want to talk about it, I don't want to be in there. They'll call my parents either way, right? Might as well just ditch school.

I don't grab anything from my locker, just leave using a side door. I turn the corner to head to a park when I bump into someone, yelping as I do. I look up and see Keith, eyes a bit wide and eyes a puffy red. He's clearly been crying, but why? He has everything, he is loved by everyone. Why is he crying? 

"You're ditching..?" He asks, surprised and almost a bit shocked. I nod slightly. He sighs. "Hey, could you talk to me? I'm worried about someone I really care about. Hell, I love this person. I need some advice to help them..." Of course he likes someone, of course he doesn't like me because why would he like me? I'm terrible and no one should like me let alone love me. I was looking for a sign of what day to do it, and fucking hell, this whole day so far has been a sign. 

"Of course, Keith!"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please, leave a comment! Also, the reason it seems so chaotic is because Lance is panicking.


	5. Eyes

Lance POV

Keith starts to speak, but I can't hear what he's saying. I watch the way his lips move, look at his deep violet eyes that I could just lose myself in, notice the sharpness of his jaw, the way his hair is perfect as it frames his face, his whole damn face, which seems to be getting closer.

"Lance? Are you listening?" I nod slightly, blushing at his husky voice. 

Keith POV

Why is he looking at me like that? His beautiful eyes are shining slightly. He leans slightly closer and I try not to blush, but sure as hell notice the red flush on his freckled cheeks. I look at his eyes again. A mistake. Goddamn, those eyes. They take me deep into his soul, the pain and sadness he's been hiding from us clear as I look into his ocean blue irises. I sigh, and start to speak to him.

"Lance, what happened to your hand? We kind of figured out that thing with the... um... cuts... but how did you hurt your hand?" He seems to come back to reality from elsewhere. He sighs softly.

"It doesn't matter, Keith. I'm fine."

"You clearly aren't. So what happened to your hand?" He seems conflicted for a moment, then gives in.

"Lotor Galra is bullying me." I can tell it wasn't a lie, not in the slightest. I can tell when someone is lying. He looks me in the eyes. "But don't bring it up to the others, okay? Allura is probably pissed at me, thinking I just want attention or something. Hunk and Pidge are probably terrified, and Shiro... he's probably reporting it to the counselor. You? I don't know how you're reacting. But... You don't care, and that's fine. I don't care either." Fuck, why would he think I don't care? I care so much about him and his damn pretty face and his stupid brown hair that's curling up slightly in the humid air. 

"You have curly hair." I mumble softly, reaching out to touch the curling hairs. "Do you straighten it?" He turns red.

"U-uh yeah. why..?"

"You'd look really cute if you let it curl." I speak without thinking. Dammit, dammit, dammit! What if he's homophobic, and he realizes how fucking gay I am and hates me? What if he figures out my crush on him and then decides not to be my friend? Then, I hear the most amazing noise I have ever dreamed of maybe hearing one day. He giggles.

"Me? Cute? You think I could be cute, in any way? Are you flirting with me, Kogane?" I blush, the words he just said each like a bullet striking me in the heart with how damn cute he is, and the possibility he's okay with me flirting with him. God, I want to kiss him. But I won't. Self control is important. And he probably doesn't like me like that anyways.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> please leave a comment, it makes my day! Also, he isn't lying about Lotor bullying him, but it just isnt how his hand got hurt, as we know :D


	6. not a chapter

sorry for not posting. i havent been in a good place mentally. so yeah.


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> im back

Lance POV

"Keith, as much as I love your attempt at stealing my heart, I have somewhere I need to be." I say, smirking slightly as I tease him. I look away, slightly flustered at the idea of Keith trying to make me fall in love with him. He nods quickly, then turns and runs away. Dammit. I scared him away. Good job, self. I start walking, not having any particular destination. It doesn't matter where I end up, I'm going to kill myself there. Because life is just way too damn hard so why even try anymore..?

Keith POV

Dammit, my gay ass ran away. Something was clearly wrong, but I just ran. I need to apologize... I notice him walking away from the school and start walking after him, too tired to run but hoping I could catch up anyways.


End file.
